Choke is a magazine.

Choke has an internet forum. Choke Forum∞

The Choke forum is the anti-VJ.

Several users claim to have succesfully bridged the gap between VJ and Choke, but they are usually suspected to be witches.

Choke users usually prefer music produced by bands that have names with 9 or more words in them. The more obscure the band, the higher credibility this gets them within the Choke inner circle. They score extra points if the music was published prior to 1980.

Choke also runs a regular music night at a Bristol venue. To recreate the music at such an event, you are advised to strap on a bass guitar, snare drum and a cymbal, and throw yourself down a staircase.

Choke is available on Computers

CHOKE IS NOT INTO METAL AND IS NOT YOUR FRIEND

Choke

The world outside is bad. Really bad. It's full of people with trendy haircuts listening to fashionable music which is almost entirely without merit. It's filled with bands desperate to get record deals who have literally no idea about how to entertain themselves, let alone anyone else. It is run by selfish, greedy, power-hungry, superficial liars and populated by useless suckers.

Choke isn't really anything. It's just a word put onto gig posters to give alienated people a sense of community. It's just a name given to a forum because the forum needed a name. It's just a name given to a magazine which almost never comes out filled with the onanistic spurtings of people otherwise driven to staggering up and down the Gloucester Road muttering to themselves.

Choke is not a political party, a business venture or a masonic sect.

If Choke hates you, and it probably does, don't take it personally. You are a product of an evil world and your parents are useless consumer whores. You never stood a fucking chance.

Choke will see you down the front.

www.chokecentral.co.uk∞